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Chapter34

Harry

Dracogetspardoned.

Harry’snotsurewhyitcomesasashock,really,especiallyconsideringhowheandHermioneandGeorgehavebeenshowingupattheministryonceaweeklobbyingforachangeinhiscriminalstatus,butnowthattheproofofthechangeisstaringupathiminblackandwhite,Harrycan’thelpbutfeellikethegroundhadfallenoutfromunderneathhim.

“It’sover,”Dracosays,andhe’sgottearsinhiseyes,andHarrypullshimselfoutofhisownheadlongenoughtonoticethetearsinhisboyfriend’seyesandthewaythathishandsaretrembling,justalittle,themosttheyhaveindays,andrealizeshowgreatthismustbeforhim,tonotbeamarkedmanforthefirsttimeinfiveyears.There’sadifferencebetweentellingyourselfthatyouareinnocenteverynightbeforeyougotosleepandhavingthegovernmentproclaimittothewholeworld,astheDailyProphetwouldsurelysayintomorrow’spaper.“It’sallover.”

Overisreallyafunnywordforit.There’sbeenaneverendingseriesofmomentswhereHarrythinksitisoveronlytofindthatheiswrong—killingVoldemortjusttorealizethathissupportersarestilloutthere,thinkingthatheiswalkingawayfromtheaurordepartmenttoletotherpeoplehandleitandfindingthatboxfromMoody,amessagefrombeyondthegrave,leavingthatbehindonlytobepulledbackinwhentheydropachandelieronhisboyfriend’sheadduringtheattemptedmurderofhisbestfriend.

It’sallveryconfusing,thisbackandforth,butfinally,Harrywashavingtocometotermsthatfinally,afteryearsoffighting,hewasfinallygoingtobeatpeace.Thefightingwasdoneandthefuneralswereoverandevenpastsinswerebeingforgiven,likethatowltoDracoshowed.

What’sasoliderwithoutawartofightin?ItwassomethingthatRonsaidinthefirstnightsofthetentativepeaceafterVoldemorthadfallen,andHarrydidn’thaveananswer.Didn’tbothertoanswer,really,becausebeneathallthegriefwasthehumofvictoryandtheideathathewasgoingtospendtherestofhislifewithhisarmsaroundGinny,thatmostly,everyonehelovedhadcomethroughokay,eventhoughtheyweren’tokayatall.

Thathadbeenabadfeeling,wakingupandrealizingthatitwouldneverend,notforhim.

Thisfeelingwasworse,becauseheknowsthatitmakeshimaterribleperson,wishingthatmaybethiswouldhavewaitedjustafewmoremonths.

“That’sgreat!”Harryhearshisownvoiceandwantstocringe,becauseitismuchtoocheeryandmuchmorerobustthanitshouldhavebeen.HewantstocoveritupbyholdingDraco,wrappinghiminahugorkissinghimonthecheek,sometactilesymbolofhowmuchhecaresabouthim,butitseemslikeheisstruckdumbbythenews.Dracoistoocaughtupintheideaofbeingfreethathedoesn’tevennotice.“Weshouldcelebrate!”

“Merlin,I’vegottocallHermione.”Draco’svoiceisfaint,likehemightpassoutfromexcitementatanymoment.“Thinkshe’llmindifIjustflooover?”

“Whenyouhavenewslikethis?”Hisvoiceisstilltooforced,toowrong.“Notachance.”

“Hey.”Draco’seyesfixonHarryforthefirsttimesinceDraco’sshoutdrewhimintothekitchen,andthenhedrawshimintoakiss,becausethey’reboyfriendsandgettodostufflikethatnowjusttoprovetoeachotherthattheycan.Thattheywantto.Thathopefully,theywillalwayswantto.“Iknowyoudidalottogetmehere.Thatalotofpeoplethoughtyouwerecrazyfornevergivinguponme.”HedrawshimevencloserandmakesHarrylookintohiseyes,likehewouldmisssomeoftheseriousnessofthemomentifhewaslookingatthefloor.“Thankyou.”

“Don’tthankme.”Harryfeltmiserable.“Ididn’tdoanythingthattheministryshouldn’thavedoneagesago.”

“Still,”Dracosaid,andheishappyagain,likenothingwaswrongbetweenthem.“Thankyou.”

Hekisseshimonemoretimeandthenleavestheroom,presumablytocalleveryonethattheirfloonetworkwasconnectedtoandshoutthegoodnewsintotheiremptylivingroomsuntilhegrowshoarse.Harrytakesthetimetosinkdownontooneofthekitchenchairsandcatchhisbreath,headtuckedbetweenhisknees,likehehadjustgottenthewindknockedoutofhimandneedsaminutetocurbthenausea.

Harrywashappyforhim.Honesty.TheonlytroublesomebitwasthattheideaofDracobeingonprobationwasthefoundationoftheirrelationship,whereHarryalwaysknewthathewouldbehere,apermanentpromisehecouldnotdefaulton.Andmaybeitwassortofscrewedupinaway(alright,definitelyscrewedup)butbeyondeverythingelse,thefactthattheywereroommateswastheonethingthatwouldchainthemtogetherevenwhentheworldaroundthemwastryingtopullthemapart.