Dracoshiftedinhisseat.ThisconversationfelttoomeaningfulforPottertohaveitwithhimofallpeople.But,eventhoughhedidn’tlikeit,hehadtoadmit,hedidgetwhatPotterwastalkingabout.
“Itseemstome,anawfullybigpartofyourlifeinvolvespleasingothers.”AndboydidDracoknowwhatthatwaslike.Evennow,withhisfatherinAzkaban,heoftencaughthimselfwonderingifhewouldapproveofDraco’sactions.Italwaystookalottoremindhimselfhewasn’tsupposedtocareaboutthatanymore.
“Yeah,Iguessitis,”Pottermurmured.“Ican’thelpit.It’salwaysbeenthatway.”
“Youdiedforfuck’ssake,”Dracosaid,irritationflaringupinhim.“Youdiedtosaveallofourarses.Youdon’toweanybodyanything.Ifanything,therestoftheworldowesyou!”
JudgingfromthelookonPotter’sface,hehadn’texpectedDracotosaysomethinglikethat.Honestly,Dracohadn’texpectedhimselftosaysomethinglikethat.Butitwastrue,wasn’tit?Potterhadsavedbloodyeveryone.Andnowhestillfeltlikehehadtodowhatpeopleexpectedofhim?
Dracosighed,dreadingwhathewasabouttosaynext.“Youdorealiseitwouldn’tbeselfishofyoutolivethelifeyouwantforyourself,right?”
Potter’seyeswidened.
“You’renotdoinganybodyanyfavours,beingalltorturedandbrokenupaboutit.”Ashereachedforhiscup,Dracomadesurehiseyesdidn’tleavePotter’s.Itwasharderthanhehadanticipated.Hewasbeingahypocrite.Becausethatwasexactlywhathewasdoing,but,apparently,hewasbetterathidingitthanPotter.Butitwasn’tlikehewasn’tworkingonit.Hewastryingtobebetter.Itjusttooktime.Apparently.
“I…Ihaven’tthoughtofitthatway,”Pottersaid,astonishmentwrittenalloverhisface.
“Well,asmymotheralwayssays,youcan’tmakeotherpeoplehappyifyouaren’ttrulyhappyyourself.”
Potterlookedlikehewantedtosaysomething,buthestayedsilentandsimplynodded.Dracoinwardlysnorted.HowhadthisturnedintoaMindHealingsession?Itwasutterlyabsurd.
“Areyouhappy?”Pottersuddenlyasked.Draco’smouthdroppedopeninvoluntarily.Hisinstinctstoldhimtoreplywithsomethingsnarky.But…afterPotter’shonesty,baringhisinsecurities,itjustdidn’tfeelright.
“Idon’tknow,”Dracosighed.“IthinkI’mhappierthanIwasrightafterthewar.”
Hedidn’twanttogetintotoomanydetails.JustbecausePotterfeltcomfortablesharinghissecretswithDraco,didn’tmeanhehadtodothesame.
“Youeverthinkaboutgettingajob?”Potterasked.
Dracosnorted.“Asifanyonewouldemployme.”
“Idon’tthinkit’slikethatanymore.”
Dracoshrugged.“Bethatasitmay,Ican’treallyseemyselfworkingforsomeone.Ihavemyfamily’sinheritance,whichisabouttheonlythingtheMinistrydidn’ttakeawayfromme.Imadesomeinvestments,sohonestly,Idon’tneedtowork.”
Potterseemedtoponderthat.“Yeah,but…don’tyouwant…apurpose?Inlife?”
Dracosneered,actingasthoughthatwaspreposterous.Potterdidn’tneedtoknowhehadbeenstrugglingwiththatforyears.Luckily,hehadfoundsomethingtogivehimpurpose.
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